Thursday, November 28, 2013 ❣

Cake your face.

Here to rant yet about another ordinary month.

Recent faces.

I am about to verge upon the butt end of my first semester in this campus and that can only mean... final exams are in a week. I was assigned two subjects, one which was at a 100% coursework grading. So that means I only had one paper to sit for this week... French.

Having only two subjects brought about only 3 days of classes with extra short study hours during the week. for 7 weeks. I was at ease. Given my very little hours of exposure in the university, people hardly see me and I hardly see them too. 

But don't get me wrong. I have friends. Quite an amount of them I might say. Friends that did pre-u with me and also my secondary school friends. But still, it's still kinda difficult to actually see them around the campus. Not saying that I do not bump into any friends but the thing is... Every time when I do bump into a friend, this will happen...

Friend: Hey Eunice! I didn't know you're studying here! What course are you doing?
Me: Hi Friend! It's been a while. I'm doing CL.
Friend: Waaaahh. You makeup ah?
Me: Erh...Yeah... I gotta go dude. See ya!
Friend: Ok!

Sometimes I feel like I am being a little too gracious. I wouldn't flip out like this if people were to ask me this once. But do you really have to ask me so many times? I am not doing my make up like stage gaga now am I? I really do not know how to respond to this. Why does this only happen in my school? Maybe because only 20% of the girls in my university wears makeup. So I guess that's why they're going all ballistic on me and trying to tell me that wearing makeup here is weird and uncalled for. 

Well, I guess unless you have really bad eye sight, why else would you deliberately ask if someone's wearing makeup when you can clearly tell that she is? You think I look weird is it? Not nice is it?

Your thoughts?

Sunday, November 17, 2013 ❣

Even when I don't say a thing.

I was complete fine until about 5 days ago. I do not get sick often. Yes, I mean it. I am not your typical girlie girl that get feverish or get tummy aches just after eating food that went bad or after getting rained on a little. I have a strong immune system. My body is used to all the bacteria I take in daily. I don't normally get colds or fevers or flus or anything. And even if I did get under attack germs and viruses, I don't visit Mr. An Apple A Day. I'd just chuck down two of those white things that reliefs headaches. Yes smartass, panadol. I consider myself getting sick an annual thing. So I guess the time of the year has arrived. Yeepee?

I had a minor cold. You know just the common cold, running nose, sore and itching throat, the constant sneezing and watery eyes. After the third day, I know everything was about to end. When suddenly the universe just decides to rain on my parade. I mean that literally. I literally got rained on. So that very same night, I got the fever. 

So weak, getting cold and feeling lethargic all the time really is not my thing. I don't even know what I can or cannot and should or should not do when I'm sick. Don't tell me I'm stupid because this is the basics and general knowledge, I am not a fking NURSE. Why don't you go build a fking computer using carbon nanotubes. That's basics for some kind of engineering, no?

Anyway back to my story. I wouldn't say I'm totally clueless about being a sickie. But having such a wonderful boyfriend that attends to your every need, it just makes you want to know nothing at all. With him around, maybe being sick is not such a bad thing after all. I get more hugs and kisses. And not to mention hot chocolates and chicken soup in bed. 

Unfortunately, today should be my last day being a sickie. Thanks to you, I feel so much better. Thanks for treating me like a princess and always doing whatever you can to make me happy. 

Thank you for loving me. 

Friday, August 30, 2013 ❣

Around the clock.

This was taken almost a year ago. It has been ages since I had a night like this, a night racing the clock to finish a video. I can recall this night like it was just yesterday, I was flipping through old books that my dad put together some time ago, searching for a nice song to cover. I remember looking all over the place but still couldn't managed to find my capo, so I ended up using a 2B pencil instead.

My sister and I spent the entire night battling out on which song was better. We were both kinda furious at each other, like extremely boiling. But the both of us ended up being endlessly entertained by the comeback lines and moronic facial expressions we made at each other. We had a long laugh and settled down on one song, My Love by Westlife ♫ ♪

After a while of unremitting coughs and warm-ups, we finally took out the camera and started recording. But it was already 2am and as the night got colder, we got a little drowsier. We didn't manage to film the perfect cover, but we wound up with numerous imperfect clips. We didn't upload it onto our Youtube channel in the end, but I wouldn't say the night was wasted. They were all saved in the family hard disk, together with every other foiled-night's worth of short cover videos. We both had fun. I wonder if she still remembers.

Do you, sis?

Wednesday, August 28, 2013 ❣

Hey Bella Bella!

About couple weeks ago, my mom saw this dog adoption thing on Facebook posted by some kind people we like to call 'the rescuers'. It's about three beautiful little puppies. These pups went through a hell of a hard time before the rescuers found them. 

It was not more than an ordinary day, I guess they were just taking a stroll? When suddenly they passed by a dumpster. They began to hear the howling and crying sounds of puppies. These people started looking up and down, high and low for where the source of the sound was coming from. They threw open the lid of the dumpster and started rummaging through the dirt and bags of garbage. One bag after another when finally they found 3 little pups. Two of them got their poor little tails cut off till even their tail bone were visible. The other one, well, they couldn't even see a tail.

I guess these kind people brought them back, wash them, fed them and gave them a home. 

When my mom saw the ad for adoption on Facebook, she just picked up her phone and called him without hesitation. And so, yeah. We went over to the rescuer's house, chit chatted a lil and brought our new family member home with us. 

Her name is Bella.
And she is that pup without her tail.

But for now, I'll just call her baby. Until the day she's too big for the name.
She won't get confused, they are plenty more people calling her by her name. haha

She 7 weeks old and she bites everything she sees. Especially toes and fingers! We put her in her cage when she sleeps. My backyard isn't fully-tiled or cemented. We have lots of grass and my dad mows it every once a month. The corners of my house aren't really visibly sealed, there are shit loads of leave, vines, plants and grass twirling and twining all over the fence. And not to mention my house is on a very big hill, so you can see the world from my backyard. 

We have to put her in a cage, otherwise she'd fall off the corners of my house or something. Only until she gets older and bigger and well, until she can't fit through the little hole in the fence. But of course we don't cage her for the whole day. Actually, she's out most of the time, I mean when she's awake.

My backyard is a very 'happening' place. There will always be someone there. Its either my mom cooking, my dad during the laundry or just us wanting to play with her. Haha. But she still has to go in at night. She whines and cries every time we put her back into her cage. I guess she just prefers sleeping on the tiles, under the table rather than being locked up in a cell :( 

Oh and if you're wondering about my two other dogs. Bubbles is just a coward. Whenever Bella gets closer to him, he would just get up and run as far as he can. Not because he doesn't want to play with her or anything, just because he is scared. 

And Sunshine, well erm, she's really pissed that Bella's around. You know, bitches get jealous. So I guess you can say Sunshine hates her. But I'm sure they'll get along, eventually.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013 ❣

Can you ever have enough?

Sometimes I sit down and contemplate all that has happened. But never have I written them down. I remember those years when I used either cry or feel like crying every single moment of my life. I'd call up my best friend and cry over the phone every single night asking myself why. 

It just makes me wonder why, why didn't I stop all those nonsense earlier. I can still imagine all the pain come over me as my heart was destroyed. Over and over again, it kept happening and it never stopped. I never stopped it. It was so long ago. There are no hard feelings. No grudges. No remorse.

That was ages ago. Today is a different story. Today I have you.

Ever since you came into my life, I am a different person. I smile more and laugh more. You made me feel so loved. All you want is for me to smile and I know you'd do anything for that. Your smile too is all I need to kick off the day. You're my inspiration, motivation and running drive to wake up everyday. I never really took the time or effort to see into each and every one of the little and big things you've done for me.

I really do wish for the very best for you. Happy 20th Birthday Jerry Lim!

Saturday, August 24, 2013 ❣

Whatever lah!

So I think it's finally the time to blog. About what you may ask? Well, everything! I guess the only reason why I didn't was because many things had been happening and frankly I'm just not too happy about them. So I am going to sum up these past couple months in a few of my favorite words...


And it's just getting on my last nerve. I don't know what I've ever did to make the universe despise me so much at the moment but I just can't help it. I want it to be okay when I jump up and down, do whatever I want and just yell out to the universe that THIS IS JUST NOT FAIR.

This is the only available picture. *yawns

Around the first week of July, I bought a new purse for myself. Nothing special, just a normal black leather Alain Delon. After using it for only 3 wonderful weeks, I went to work one day just to come back with a heavyhearted soul and in grief. No wait. No no no! I went to the police station first, lodged a police report, then home with my bitter and gloomy self. I lost my new purse and everything in it. So I end up carrying around a temporary IC and also a police report everywhere I go. I finally got over the fact that I can never ever have the chance to see my purse, IC, licence, photos etc anymore. And I also thought the nightmare is over. 

On the 13th of August, my 11 year old dog Lassie passed away. He has been with me for 8 years. We dug his grave and buried him beside our house. No matter what, he'll still be around watching over us and our house. I used to always come home from school and talk to him about all my never ending high school dramas. Now that he's not around anymore, us especially Sunshine & Bubbles have been so moody. We're okay.

I guess he's okay now too.

A week ago, my brother, boyfriend and I went to TM point together. We went in, asked a couple questions, then got out. I was a 2 minute stop. Our next stop was AEON. On the way there, my boyfriend got a phone call from my number. But I guess it was an accidental call as it was only ringing for only 2 seconds. When he tried to call back, it went into voice mail. So I drove back to TM, stormed in and asked the girl sitting behind the desk whether she saw a pink phone here. She answered me NO and then twitched, started looking around as if she was lying. I could tell she was very nervous. I mean, I don't look rich loh, if you found or took my phone, please just give it back to me lah. That was the only place I stopped at. I went in a couple more times to ask her again and again. She started getting a little defensive and angry. 

At that moment, I decided I do not want to look or ask for it anymore. I'll just leave it. And again, do I really deserve this? :( Do you know the amount of down-in-the-dump days I need to go through? Going to bed and waking up with nothing to hold? I was devastated, now I guess I have again, finally got over it.

I guess I'll be renovating and repainting my study room before the ends.

So that's July and August for me. How about you? 

Sunday, August 4, 2013 ❣

Testing one two?

Hello hello? Is anyone still reading my crap blog? Please leave a comment...
Okay. Who am I kidding. No one ever commented in the first place. That makes me sad T__T

The only reason why I have only one horrible low quality faceless picture to show is because I've recently copied my ENTIRE phone's worth of pictures out of my phone and into my hard disk. And as obvious as it is, I do not have my hard disk with me. All I could do is randomly grabbed a picture of mine from insta and crop it. TADAA. Anyway, so if you're wondering why I'm blogging now at erm... 2am. It's because I am bored, hungry and cannot sleep! 

And just so you know, I usually sleep very early!

 But I think I'm getting sleepier already. Okay. Haha. Bye bye!! 

Friday, May 17, 2013 ❣

Making the right decision.

So I've ceremoniously completed my Foundation in Science in UTAR. Yes, I said ceremoniously. I didn't do nearly as good as I should, relatively bad maybe. My perspective of course. I feel as though I am on the edge of failure, failing at every opportunity I get to actually enter a good university. 

It all started a year ago, I decided to study UTAR's FIS program and then later on continue with a degree in Mechatronic Engineering there too. Which was a ultimate stupidity. I mean, I don't even have the interest in doing stuffs like that. But more about that later. 

And so after an entire year of being strained and stressed out, I've finished it. During that whole three semesters I already know deep down that I am not cut out of engineering. My physics is not bad, but neither is it good. It is just average. Mediocre. And you know what? I really do not think doing and being mediocre is good enough to get me that degree. And judging by the percentage of UTAR Engineering dropouts and failures, I really could not imagine what would happen to me. Am I just scaring myself? What do you think? 

Nonetheless, after striking out engineering from my list, I looked towards BSc degrees. I thought to myself, I'd pick Biology over Physics hands down. But what was my barrier this time? I am not allowed many options as I did not take Biolody in my SPM. So I picked just pure chemistry for my degree. All I have to do now is just to get the transfer form and wait for approval. And hell I was darn sure that the approval will be a success. Why you may ask? That is because a friend of mine is also in the same stream as me and doing this as her degree already. So three semesters passed. And my decision was made.

So a day after I got my results, I went back to UTAR to get the transfer done with. I went to the admission department and talked to the guy about my transfer. He took my results and information in and processed for about 50 seconds. He came back to me and said 'Sorry. You are not allowed to transfer.' I stoned there. I was speechless. I did not know what to do. I questioned him and informed him about my friend's stream and course. He gave me one last sentence to shut me up, he said to me 'You have no biology in your SPM certificate.'.

At that point in time, I knew that there was nothing else I could do. 

I felt lost and indecisive  I didn't know what else I could do. All I know is that I had to have my mind made up before classes commences. And that is in a week time. Which made things even more tense. After sobbing in the car for god knows how long. I decided to let go of UTAR and shop for some other university. 

You know what? I completed my foundation with a cgpa of only 3.18. Most universities that offer the course that I want has a requirement of a minimum cgpa of 3.2 or even 3.5. Despite the fact that counselors, friends and even lecturers from all over tell me how hard is it to score well in UTAR, I believe otherwise. I have friends that score well in UTAR, so why can't I? I blame myself for not working hard enough and only aiming for an average grade in everything.

Later that day, my boyfriend brought me to MAHSA U. Had a talked with the counselors there, had them process my results and info, had a tour of the facilities there. And I got their acceptance letter to do a UK degree in Physiotherapy. This is absurd! I can get in to MAHSA's physiotherapy but not UTAR's!

My parents seem to be exceptionally affirmative of me doing this. They really are. I do not think it would be bold choice to go against their decision. But then again, I'm the one studying.

I do not know what else to say about it but you get the idea. Goodbye.

Thursday, May 2, 2013 ❣

Surviving A Stay In Ho Chi Minh City.

This post is gonna be filled with my cb faces so please brace yourselves. And again, I'm going to rant about useless things and upload unrelated pictures! I had too many pictures of HCMC and also of myself to choose from. So I chose many useless and ugly pictures. haha.

I didn't want to break my Vietnam post into 4 or 5 parts because I find that very tiring, And maybe by the time I reach the 5th part, I've entirely forgotten everything about the trip. So I decided to cramp everything into one long post! But then again I can't make it too long, because blogger might push all my previous post to the next page. You get my dilemma right? 

Thursday, April 25, 2013 ❣

Back already?


Okay. Actually, my intention was to blog only after I'm back from my trip to Vietnam. That way I have more things to rant about, I guess? But not all things go out the way we plan.

Don't ask why. 

I am one day away from ending my finals, so tomorrow's my last paper! Ah, while I was scrolling through my torn-up blog, I noticed that I only blog during my semester breaks. Which means I'v never touched or even looked at my blog when I'm having classes, exams etc. I am always so stressed up and worn out during my study time. Why? I have no idea. 

I miss those times where I bring my camera along wherever I go. I miss having that urge to take pictures of EVERYTHING just so I can put it up in my blog for everyone to see. Now, I don't even take pictures of food, sceneries or people. Heck, I don't even take pictures of myself as much as I used to. 

But that's all gonna change! Because as up now, I am going to                   . Anyway, remember my new year's post? The one where I talked about my resolution list. Well, just so you know, I am one step closer to striking out one of em! But I am not going to tell you yet.

But I'll give you a hint: I am no where close to losing weight. HAHAHA. So you can cross that guess out!

I'm as chubby as ever. Maybe I've even gained a little weight? Okay maybe a lot.

I'm trying real hard to think about what important things I've done since my last post, then a list suddenly popped into my head. There's cny, valentines omg then I stopped.

First, the highlight! 
Sting, stang, stung!

So I guess the best part would be about me burning my skin off with acid. Haha. Think the yellow patch is caused by some concentrated nitric acid and the top white one is hydrogen peroxide. I couldn't care less about what chemical it was, all I knew was it stung like a bitch. What happened that week thought me this beautiful lesson to never NEVER handle strong chemicals bare-handed! I remember that yellow stain on my skin took 2 freakin weeks to disappear! Look like I ate curry and never washed my hands. 

I only asked my lecturer what should I do one week after I stained my finger with that yellow shit. And he answered me with 'I cannot help you.'


Mission accomplished!

After trying like a gazillion times, over and over again, putting my hands up and down, up and down... I FINALLY can do this braid ALL BY MY MYSELF. I am so cool! *Letting my self-admiration go wild for a while. Because I know no one will praise me for learning this so late.. I've asked around countless times, but sadly no one wants to tell me or teach me or show me. I was a sad sad girl. But not anymore! I am so proud of myself. This also thought me to never give up no matter how pain your arms gets after holding it up for so long tying your hair.

The uneven colours on my hair look like shit. Ah well, really can't be bothered to touch up or dye them a different colour. I'm gonna leave it till it grows longer, then cut the coloured ones away. Save money.

Times up! Gotta run! CHAAA! Toodles! 
*In such a hurry even my arms are blurry.

Thursday, January 24, 2013 ❣

Lim Lynn.

I had no idea you could go to someone's instagram account through the computer. Silly me.

I remember the time when this girl and these clothes use to be my everyday life. I might have lost all the pictures I took in high school. But I will never forget each & every wonderful thing that's happened there :')

So many memory flashback. I remembered when I was 16 and going through form 4. That was the year I met her. She was a newly transferred student. As she entered 4Jati that day, everyone greeted her and welcome her to Section 3. She only smiled back at us. She didn't even put effort in to actually make any friends that day. She was a petite and quiet girl. At first glance, she came across me as a very smart and nerdy girl. I thought she was that type of person that likes to be alone. She had amazingly straight teeth and her features kinda resembles a bunny. Back then I thought to myself, I don't think we can ever more than just acquaintances.

She came in class and sat beside JiaJia. Melissa, Teng and everyone else went to her to introduce themselves. They started talking and joking around with her. But as I stood aside and observed her, she only smiled at most of the jokes she heard. Then I thought to myself, OK EMO FREAK ALERT! Nonetheless  I went over to her seat and started introducing myself. Her name is Lim Lynn. I freaked out as I have never had a friend that has only 2 syllabus in their full name. I wanted to ask her why is her name like that. But I didn't. 

As the days gone by, all of us started feeling very comfortable around her. But it seems like she hasn't yet. We were very welcoming and warm with all our words and greetings. We make silly jokes so she feel awkward. But still, what is going on in her mind? 

Then one day, Melissa told me that there was something very weird in the new student's eyes. There was a black dot at the inner side of her eyes and it was bulging out! I felt so curious so I just had to check it out. After knowing that, everyday I spoke to her, I could only pay attention to that little black piece of flesh on the side of her left eye. Until one day, I finally decided to ask her what is that thing in her eye as I could not bear with not knowing anymore. She told me that she herself has no idea what is it. She said she had went to see the doctor about it and he said it was nothing.

Months has pass and we started getting closer and closer. She also started feeling very comfortable around us. But I spend my time with her very less as I always went for recess with my boyfriend. Around the month of July, there was another new student. His name was Hew Mong Cheng. He wasn't a new person to meet for me, I remember playing badminton with him months back. But just like the first day Lynn entered, everyone started jumping and hopping on to him and started introducing himself. Including Lynn.

As the year of 2010 ended, I was still far from being bestfriends with Lynn. She doesn't go out with us and unlike most of us, she doesn't tell us about her life and problems. But I knew very well that we were all getting very fond of each other. 

During the third day of 2011, all of us went back to school, it was the first day of school and also the year we had to prepare to sit for our SPM. All of us 5Jati peeps went in to class. It was a terrible mess! Everyone was fussing around and choosing where to sit. I picked my place, it was at the corner of the class and it was next to the door. I suddenly felt something strange. I couldn't see Lynn. Apparently she wasn't able to come to school. All of us sat around the corner of the class, but none of us were able to save a seat for Lynn. 

The day she came to school, we had to tell her she's not going to be sitting with us throughout the year. We sat very far apart. But she always walked over to our place. 2012 is the year I started understanding her life more. She started telling us more about herself. But 2012 is also the year I had countless life crisis. I argued with my parents and boyfriend twice a week, I got stabbed by my use-to-be 'goodfriends' in the back real hard etc. As everything happened, she was there to listen to every single detail. She doesn't only want to listen just because she wants me to feel better and to release everything. She actually cares about my life and she remembers everything about my life and family. She remembers everything I've ever said to her. She constantly ask me about them. She never tries to say any thing motivational to me, but to me, everything that came out from her mouth was motivational. Back then, I really couldn't see it. I really couldn't see the big picture she and everyone else painted in front of me. That was because I was too busy with my boyfriend, with my own life that I couldn't pay much attention to the friends that actually cared and loved me. 

Now, I see everything. Back then, I just couldn't mash both my friends and my boyfriend together. Because I know he wouldn't like it. And they just wouldn't get along. So I just had to entertain both parties separately. But still, after everything I've been through and after countless times of being ditched by me, she still remembers and she still cares. 

Now, this is the second year since I've graduated. She is still sticking around. Despite the fact that we're in different universities. She still cares and have strong urges to actually want to know every single detail about my life. She wants to know what happened in school. She wants to know how I met my current boyfriend. I never realized this, but after 3 years, I can finally see that she is a very important person in my life. I am so use to everything now, that after I've done something or after something big happened, I have that strong feeling of calling her and telling her everything. I always thought my one and only bestfriend was Melissa, but unknowingly, I've made another one. The one I could never imagine would be. The one that I could never see. I feel so stupid. She helped me through everything, even my studies. She is a very humble and modest girl. She doesn't like to admit that she is smart, she would just categorized herself as 'average'. But she was a genius. Still is. 

I regret not making the best of our my high school life. 
I regret not spending more time with my high school friends. 

Thank you Lim Lynn for moving to Bandar Kinrara. Thank you for transferring to Section 3. Thank you for walking in my life and thank you taking up such a big space in my heart.

Sunday, January 13, 2013 ❣

Two Oh One Three!

I was so swamped up on my last post I completely forgotten to say Happy 2013! So happy new year guys!

This year, I did not go to any crowded places to countdown to 2013. Well, mainly it was because I'm terribly afraid I'd get robbed by idiots unknowingly or maybe I'll even get some major leg crampage because of the all-night-standing event they've prepared for us. I definitely would not like to spend my last night of 2012 with fatties having their sweaty and sticky armpits just grinding against my (maybe) sweaty body. And plus I'd get insufficient oxygen that night and might die on the spot due to the crowd *coughs* but mainly due to my height as I am not that tall. Taller people just tend to suck up all the oxygen there is. I pity them dwarfs. Figures. And when I sweat, I'd smell like a hippopotamus' number two. Why the hell would I want to dress up so nicely and end up getting soaked in my own sweat?

Okay I'm just kidding. Despite the crowd, I'm actually really jealous of the people that get to see big beautiful fireworks! All I saw was a mini version of a firework performance. And the sounds? Maybe if I clap my hands loud enough, I wouldn't even be able to hear the bok bok sound of the fireworks. So there, 
I'm jealous :(

So this is the miniature shit I saw that night. Oh well. I'm done complaining. 

But hey. I wouldn't say my countdown was that bad. Just the fireworks part. I'm glad I get to spend the last couple hours of 2012 with my cute friends. And food too! What more can I ask for? 

Okay, maybe I could have asked for a bigger view of the fireworks. But no complaints! Haha. 

I don't usually make any new year's resolutions because I know for sure I will never come through with it. So why do I want to waste my time. Save the disappointments, right? But that was when I was young. I am unofficially nineteen now! And for this, I shall make a resolution list for 2013!

Eunice's Resolutions for 2013
1) Start saving money, stop spending!
Ever since I was a little girl, I did not have any sort of saving habits. Not even those excess 20cents or 50cents change. I had dozens of piggie banks that people gift wrapped for me, but never once have I ever used them. When I see money in my purse, I spend. Even now, I am nineteen (emphasizing :P) and IF you manage to successfully sneak your way into my house to rob me, I swear you will not be able to find a single cent. I mean rob me, not my family. Lol. I know it's a bad habit. But that's all going to change! I hope...

Or maybe I'll just get this...

2) Get better grades in my degree.
I have completely given up on my foundation year. I've scored so averagely in the first two trimesters that I know it is highly impossible for me to pull up my cgpa to a 3.0 now. So I'll just stroll through this final trimester and get yet another disappointing 2.8 -__- I will just have to save up all my hard work now so I can pour everything out during my first couple years of degree. Mindset of a proud Malaysian! Okay, just don't flunk this one Eunice!

3) Fats off!
This should be interesting... I've gained so much I swear I dare not stand on the weighing scale. I rather not know my weight right now. It will only kill me psychologically. I need to loose weight! I MUST! Haha. I got so inspired by one of my close friend Jennifer ( I read her blog and do you know what I saw?! I was blinded by her awesomeness! She blogged that she successfully lost 6kgs in 2012! I was astonished! I wanted to slice away all the excess fats on my belly and my ass, literally. Ahh. I hope by the end of 2013, I can proudly say I've lost 10kgs! LOL. 

Jerry brought me to Nadeje @ Malacca the other day and well.. I don't know. It just seems like something worth mentioning. Haha. And the cakes... OH WOW.

I just thought maybe I should look at them a lil more before I officially start my weight loosing plan.

So I can proudly say that Jerry is a big contribution to my fats :) Thank you Jerry!

Oh yeah. And my dad too. For feeding me breakfasts like this. He thinks showing his love to my is feeding me with fatty food. Some dad right.

And my mom too. For always buying sweet cakes, tarts and cookies. And for also making sweet cakes, tarts and cookies.

Okay. Maybe I'm just exaggerating. My parents feed me healthy food. The fat credits mostly goes to Jerry.  

4)Stop biting my nails.
Okay. This, I know is pointless writing. I've been biting my nails ever since I could chew. How awesome am I? I can never have beautiful manicures like most girls. I cannot look all high class with my expensive, sparkly, hard, gel/acrylic nails. I am a sad sad girl. I have been wanting to stop ever since I was thirteen. And I am nineteen (emphasizing again :P) now! But maybe after writing this here, I'll try harder? Who knows?

5) Control my temper.
I hate people that are born annoying! I hate being annoyed by people that are born annoying!  I have no idea why I get irritated so easily. When I get heated up, I can't be cooled down by anyone. And I will start showing that sour bitch face (I know its very ugly and you feel like slapping me). I know I tend to act like a stuck up bitch or queen of the world whenever I am angry. I really do not know how all of you cope with me. I am so sorry. I need to try taking deep breaths every time someone stupid decides to stupidify me.

6) Care and appreciate those who love me. 
My big big family. Somehow, after countless arguments with my parents, siblings and relatives, no matter how hard we fought against each other, whenever I needed help, they were always there for me. They are always there for me whenever I fall. They are always there to pick me up no matter how deep-a-shit I got myself into. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make sure I am okay. I love my family.

Just gotta love them. I mean, how can I not, right?

Besides my family there's also one other person that has been holding me up all this time. He was there for me every single millisecond I broke down, had my mood swung up, down and all around. He was there when I had countless 'mid-life' crisis and every single time I overreacted over nothing. Sounds like fun huh?

Especially all the times I stressed out about my studies.

Thank you Jerr :)

So I guess that's all the major ones on my list this year. Those other minors details like end world hunger or treat people nicer etc. do not have to be stated now, do they? But nonetheless  I think I am going to have a wonderful year ahead of me! Cheers to twenty-thirteen!

Friday, January 11, 2013 ❣


Ahh. It has been so long since I last blogged. I wonder if you still remember how I look like.
If you make it to the end of this post, you get a cookie ;)

I do not have the right word to portray these couple months that I have been through. But maybe I'll start off with today. I do not know whether to call it an astounding or a rotten day. You be the judge. I am presently having such contradictory feelings, I don't even know where shall I begin. I overheard from many that today would be the day of the release of our semester results. And yes, I was terrified. 

Ever since the ending of December 2012, I have been having disastrous dreams. Well, nightmares if you may. And all of them are about my finals exam and my finals results. I did extremely bad on my Math paper. I haven't felt so bad about a paper for so long. I did not know how to cope with it. I came out of that examination hall feeling devastated. After that paper on the 29th of December, till a few hours ago, I have been having the exact indescribable feeling.

Nightmares, over and over again. I just wished everything would stop. All I wanted was to stop thinking about it. I had several nightmares these pass two weeks about how that day went down. And not to mention nightmares about the day I would finally get my results, together with my backfire face when I see a gigantic F across the ending of the row with 'Mathematics II' on it. I had nightmares of the same kind for four days in a row. I couldn't help but think to myself, 'Is the universe trying to tell me something?' 

Ever since I finished my Math paper that day, he has been trying really hard to distract me and my thoughts. But I just couldn't help it. I spend two weeks thinking about all the worst case scenarios. I know right. Idiotic, no? It's a little senseless making a big fuss over just one paper. 

As always, he came to my place. Initially, we had no intention whats so ever to check our results. But the time was here, facebook, twitter, whatsapp, everywhere! Everyone was whining around about the results. Unknowingly, I went to chrome and clicked on to the university's portal. The website was so sluggish, it actually made me felt so frustrated, and a little fiery. 

At last, I got in. I couldn't bear the disappointment as I knew for sure I was going to flunk it. So I told him to check it for me. I had both hands on my face, covering my eyes. Feeling frightfully uneasy. As soon as he saw it, he anxiously caught me by the shoulder. His other hand clamped into my hair. He had that smile on his face. I felt confused yet still frightened. His hands slowly moved to the side of my ears and slowly twisted my head to the other side, facing the screen. I saw it. 

That very moment, my body felt light and airy, as if my feet weren't touching the ground. I relaxed in his arms and I felt so relieved. 

You think I am stupid because I am exaggerating too much and making everything seem so dramatic huh? Well, it is! :P

Hi Jerry. Thank you for everything. Thank you for dealing with my constant need for validation and reassurance. Thank you for always be there and always telling me everything will be alright. I know my life just seems to fall apart on a daily basis and I know I do whine a lot sometimes. But still, thank you for sticking by my side and always standing by me. 

And hey! This my first post in 2013! hoorah?

So, cookie anyone? ;)
Funny you scrolled all the way down here :P Hehehe. Have a great day ahead ❤